Cinda Jo Bauman: Children's Book Writer & Illustrator, Cut-Paper Artist, and More!

Archive for December, 2020

Conflicting Emotions

I’m not one to write a reflecting back on the year type of post. But, I have never before experienced a year filled with so many conflicting emotions. Maybe you’ve felt the same? Some of mine have been terror but peace, heartache but happiness, guilt but appreciation, fear of what the future will bring, but hope for a miraculous future.

I know God wants me to feel thankful, not guilty. I’m working on that. But it’s hard not to feel guilty for having a job I enjoy and great health, when there’s a pandemic taking other’s jobs and lives by the minute. Then today, I practically jumped up and down (my old, arthritic knees kept me from really doing that, but inside, I was JUMPING) when I opened the mailbox and saw the review copy of my book inside; while just last night, I couldn’t sleep because I worried about all the people who must be wondering how in the world they will pay rent, buy food, and everything else, when their unemployment runs out. I imagine I’m not the only one struggling with conflicting emotions.

I’m very thankful for my faith in God. And although I don’t understand why so many people have suffered this year – mentally from loss of loved ones, physically from illnesses, or financially from the pandemic; I do believe that someday I will sit beside God and get the answers to my questions, and then I’ll understand. I also believe that the answers will be deeper than I ever could have understood while here on earth. Until then I will pray with my whole heart for all who are hurting. I’ll pray for peace and healing for you and for the people you love.

Has this year made you feel helpless, too? Helpless and conflicted, boy am I a mess! I’ve decided the best thing I can do is to count my blessings every second, but also watch for ways where I can somehow brighten other’s days. I’m sure it will be in small ways for now, but who knows what God has planned for me to be able to help others.

May God bless you always.

This. Is. Real.

My mind is swirling like the sugar in a cotton candy machine. So please forgive me if I babble.

When Margo Dill, publisher/editor of Editor-911 Books, told me she wanted to publish my middle-grade novel, I thought that was THE best day ever. Then, today, she sent me the link to the Amazon book page (above) saying that the pre-order for the Kindle version was live, and the print book will be available to buy on January 19th! When I clicked the link, my heart must have stopped beating for a second, because I seriously got a little light headed. All I could think was: This Is Really Happening!

Please check it out! I’m so proud of how both the novel and the cover turned out! I made the cover art all with cut and torn paper except for the face. I tried many times to make the face with cut paper, but those tiny eyes and mouth would not cooperate with my fat fingers, or even with tweezers,  so I gave up and painted her face. A huge thanks to Jamey for modeling for me and to Jama for catching the perfect shot of her horse, Cowboy, for reference. The torn paper background was an interesting challenge since I had never tried collage! The straw field is torn paper with oil pastel. My biggest challenges, since I’d never made art for a book cover before, were finding a larger size that would scale down correctly for the final book dimensions, and being an amature PhotoShop user, adding the text and making even small corrections on a slow computer took me FOREVER. I kept telling myself, you know a ton of people who could do this for you in seconds, but I was determined to be able to do it all myself. I’m so glad I kept trying because it feels superfantastic to look at this book cover and say – I did that! I hope you like it.❤ 

If you would like a signed copy, by then I should have this site set up to buy a book, and I will mail it to you. You can also keep up with news about my book and other books by signing up for the Editor-911 Books newsletter here:

Thank you for listening to my excited babbling!